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Tag: psychotherapy

“Hold On While I place This Order!” Do’s and Don’ts for Online Therapy

Written by The Village Institute on . Posted in Blog, Featured, Lifestyle, Mental Health.

If you were in therapy before the pandemic, you may remember actually going to your therapist’s office; a place that was designed to be a safe, quiet and secure environment. You would take the time to get yourself ready and then travel to that environment, to meet your therapist who had a time set aside to focus on you.  The commute itself was an opportunity to mentally prepare yourself for the session ahead. Once physically in the office, you had to sit up in a chair… and wear pants.

Even though it is not possible for all of us to have this same quiet environment, especially in crowded homes or small apartments, we should make an effort to follow those previously unspoken guidelines. This goes for therapists as much as for the clients.

We should make it a point to bring some of the unspoken rules, courtesies and formalities of in-person therapy into the online-therapy style. This is true for clients as well as for therapists. While you will see a bit of humor in this post, you will also see that the main point is this: Therapy, online or in person, is your time and it deserves to be prioritized and, when possible, uninterrupted.

Talking with your therapist about a childhood trauma while merging into traffic? Don’t.

Getting ready for the rest of your day during a therapy session? Don’t.

Asking your therapist to hold so you can order fast food? Nope.

Even though it is not possible for all of us to have this same quiet environment, especially in crowded homes or small apartments, we should make an effort to follow those previously unspoken guidelines. This goes for therapists as much as for the clients.

DO’s:

Present yourself like you would in the office.

Try your best to choose a good place for your appointment and stay there for the duration. Is a closet or bathroom your only private space? That’s okay.

Turn your ringer off, or better yet put your phone away. Everyone knows when you are texting.

Get up and out of bed.

Take a few moments before and after your session, like you would during a commute, before re-entering your workspace or family-life; pause, reflect, resonate.

This is still YOUR time. Treat it as a priority.

Is Your Job Killing Your Soul?

Written by Josh Jonas on . Posted in Blog, Career.

Sometimes a relationship runs its course and so the same can be said about a career. I’m not saying that we should treat our careers the way a kid eats candy canes – a few licks and then onto the next one. In fact, a meaningless job can become meaningful the moment it begins to subsidize the other parts of your life. But there can be a litmus test- is your work killing your soul? If it is, just like a relationship, it may be time to cut bait, break up, and start exploring.

– Josh Jonas
Therapy

Stop Pregaming Therapy

Written by The Village Institute on . Posted in Blog, Career, Featured.

If you attended college in the U.S., then I’ll bet you’ve heard of pregaming. It’s when friends or students might load up on cheap drinks before visiting that expensive bar downtown. Pregaming made us feel smart and feel like we had outsmarted the system. Today as I begin a new journey here as a clinician at the Village Institute, I’m discovering that patients are trying to do the same and pregame therapy. By coming up with answers before we’ve even figured out the true problem, our patients think that they can skate around some of the requirements of therapy, like having honest, tough, and intimate conversations that might be uncomfortable at first.

The act of avoiding discomfort presents itself regularly. One patient had asked me before we had even met for our first session, “How many sessions will it take before I start seeing results?” She had already skipped to the end of our time together before we had even had the chance to meet. The problem in both of these circumstances is that too much time is being spent on the answer, and not enough time was being allotted to the question. Luckily, the need for immediate gratification is often broken down in therapy- and is usually indicative of other issues and defenses at hand.

More recently, a friend of mine was considering therapy to work through procrastination and avoidance habits. He pre-diagnosed himself with Adult ADHD to ‘get ahead of the game.’ He was pregaming therapy! This was his attempt to have the satisfaction of having a self-hypothesis confirmed, because the ambiguity of walking in and having no idea where a session could take him was overwhelming. It became quickly apparent that the issue here wasn’t a diagnosis of ADHD, but the anxiety behind relinquishing control and being vulnerable to a stranger. The fear was based upon the possibility of not having his avoidance tool at his immediate usage in the therapy room, so if he was able to walk in with some type of all-knowing powers already, he could somehow get around the discomfort. Ironically, the best work in therapy is done within the discomfort.

Whatever the appeal is for you in beginning therapy- allow this to be, but embrace the possibility of therapy being a journey, not a destination. More possibilities always come from the wisdom of knowing what we don’t know.

Top 5 Tips for Tackling Men’s Mental Health Concerns

Written by The Village Institute on . Posted in Blog, Featured, Mental Health.

Facing mental health challenges can be overwhelming, especially when you’re not sure where to start. To help you navigate these difficult times, we’ve compiled five essential tips that can make a difference. From acknowledging your struggles to seeking professional support, these steps are designed to guide you toward healing and resilience. Whether you’re dealing with stress, anxiety, or simply feeling off, these practical strategies can help you regain control and move forward with confidence.

  1. Acknowledge that you are struggling. Just accepting it may help alleviate the pain it is causing.
  2. Men tend to rage at and push away the part of them that is struggling. Have compassion with yourself for going through a tough time.
  3. Be aware of when you are numbing yourself to what’s really going on. Even zoning out in front of the television when something needs to be done can be numbing.
  4. Find one thing in your life that you can stay consistent with and do it everyday to provide some normalcy to your life. The discipline will build confidence – even if it is just going for a 20 minute walk each day.
  5. Reach out to a professional who can help with the inner work that many people need to begin healing.